Not quite sure where the last fifteen years went

Here are a few of the events from the last week:

1. Thing One took a girl on a date to the Banff Film Festival.  When they got in the car, he opened her door for her.  Where does that come from?  I mean, he sure as hell didn’t learn that from his father.

2. Thing Two discovered that my shoes are too small for her.  This means she’s no longer asking to borrow my favorite black Mary Janes with the 2” French heel.  Like I ever let her wear them anyway.

3. Thing One decided, finally, to part with what he has been affectionately referring to as the “ferret” on his upper lip.  His father got him a Gillette Mach 3 and some shaving cream and provided suitable instruction.  (Shaving, Himself’s got covered.  Chivalry not so much.)

4. Thing Two is learning a Chopin Mazurka.  I’m jealous.  Chopin and I never quite came to terms.

5. Thing One’s schooner captain offered him a summer job.  An actual job.  With wages.  For the whole summer. 

6. Thing Two made banana chocolate chip nut bread.  Just because.  She was home alone and bored.  It was really really good.

                                                                             

For the record, I’m far too young for any of this to be happening. 

I’m still 24.

Just so we’re clear on that.